Weight Loss: Establishing a Healthy Weight Mindset, Rational Fat Reduction, and Self-Acceptance

The Perfect Weight
Body Shapes Across Eras—Past and Future
Women anxiously examine their bodies in the mirror, as if it were an unreliable ally in a war of love.

—Leonardo Cohan, Lyricist

Often, women become obsessed with a weight that doesn't suit them.

In your youth, you may have had your perfect weight. Back then, you were in your early twenties, and pregnancy hadn't yet ruined your figure. Afterward, you found yourself constantly dieting, trying to get back to your pre-pregnancy weight. Weight gain meant dieting. Now, how you long to be back to your former weight, but it keeps elusive.

Perhaps you never noticed your perfect weight until one day you saw that the body you loved was no longer the same. Although you're still satisfied with your appearance, and you know that if you lost another 10 pounds or so, you could probably get back to your former weight, you're willing to try, but you can't go back.

Perhaps your best plan for reaching your perfect weight is based solely on the charts in your doctor's office. It says that for you and your health, this is the best weight. Women's Consultation: Why can I lose 10 pounds in 2 weeks, but not the last 2 pounds in 10 weeks?

Do you want to know why a wrestler would run in 90-degree Fahrenheit (32-degree Celsius) weather, sweating profusely? Is it pure folly? No, not entirely. Because he knows that sweating profusely—essentially dehydrating—is the fastest way to lose 5 pounds before stepping on the scale. Your rapid weight loss tells me that so far, most of what you've lost is water. But instead of sweating, you're likely losing weight through a strict diet, like eating low-calorie, low-carb foods.

When you drastically cut your calorie intake, your body first uses your stored carbohydrates, and only after those are depleted does it use fat—a process that eliminates excess water through urine. Therefore, it's not surprising that you lost a lot of weight in two weeks. But most of it is water, and it's not sustainable, which is why.

After a few weeks, your body adjusts to your strict diet and begins to store energy by lowering your basal metabolic rate (BMR). Prolonged calorie restriction can lower your BMR by 20-30% below normal. In this situation, your body needs fewer calories to maintain normal bodily functions. This explains the poor stabilization after rapid weight loss.

However, you can still lose those last few pounds: through exercise. It increases your BMR, and an even better approach is to combine exercise with a balanced diet. This will truly boost your BMR.

Because exercise builds muscle, the scale may not accurately indicate how successful your diet plan is. Therefore, when you have a good diet plan, avoid emphasizing the numbers. Don't fight your weight; just lose fat.

Dr. Bernice McKee, Professor and Chair of the Department of Human Nutrition and Food Science, Baton Rouge Southern University, Louisiana

The problem is you can't make it a reality.

If your pursuit of your ideal weight constantly leaves you disheartened, it might be time to face reality. Choosing a weight you desire but can never achieve is simply self-deception.

"When women wake up in the morning and step onto the scale, their entire day depends on the number on the scale," says Dr. Susan Olson, a clinical psychologist, Seattle weight management consultant, and author of *Away from Obesity: Successful Weight Loss*. She adds that we try time and again to get the number we want on the scale, but we still fail. Worse still, trying to lose too much weight can actually reduce our ability to fight obesity.

“When women diet to look thinner, they often go to extremes,” says Kathy McConnell, president of the Breoam Clinical Nutrition Society and director of Brigham and Women’s Hospital in Boston. “They often go on extreme diets, over-exercise, or take various diet pills. They try to reach an unrealistic weight that they can’t maintain, and they damage their health.”

Be Realistic
When you ask any thin woman how much she wants to weigh, she’ll tell you she could lose another 5 to 10 pounds. That’s because, Dr. Olson says, women want to be thinner than their ideal weight, and many factors contribute to this unrealistic desire.

Fashion Models
In music videos, magazine covers, television programs, and movies, it’s often the very thin, rather than the more realistically fuller-figured, women who are featured. If possible,

Accepting oneself is paramount for women.

For over thirty years, San Francisco-based Mai Musk has lived in front of cameras and audiences as a fashion model and speaker on ending emotional eating. But despite the pressure of being on camera, she has embraced herself, regardless of her weight.

"Often, the women on magazine covers and on television are very thin, but that doesn't suit me. When I was 16, I started modeling in South Africa, where I made my mark. Over the years, I've modeled all sizes from 8 to 18. No matter what size I wore—I have a photo of myself at 200 pounds—I looked great. I always looked good, walked with confidence, and felt pretty good about myself. Now, although I'm no longer a 'plus-size' model, I'm still heavier than other women in this field. I can attribute it to age or having three children, but I have to take responsibility for my habits."

"Of course, some people have criticized my weight." Most of them were men I dated. Because I'm a model, they expected me to look like Cindy Crawford, especially when I wore a swimsuit. When they started suggesting I lose weight and get plastic surgery, I usually cut them off. I think it's very important not to associate with people who don't like the real you. Because those people hurt your self-esteem, especially when the criticism is based on your appearance.

Now, I wear a size 10, which is still larger than normal in the modeling world. When I go to shows, the costume staff initially gave me a size 8, but after they saw I was a little overweight, they've been preparing larger sizes for me ever since.

This might seem strange for a model and speaker, but I almost never weigh myself. I don't want it to affect my emotions. I rely on my feelings instead. If I feel a little sluggish and my clothes start to feel tighter, I know it's time to eat less and lose weight. Accepting yourself and letting yourself develop uncontrollably are different things.

The older I get (I'm almost 50 now), the more satisfied I am with myself, and I think that's a key to happiness. I even wrote a book called "Feeling Great," which is based on my success.